U2, Football, and Misogyny

As we join our houseguests, they're sitting dumbfounded after the whirlwind that was the past hour. They're stunned and confused with the air show dates, and Will is worried the final 2 will have to sit in the house for an entire week. Boogie is more concerned with George's departure. "Shit," he says longingly, "Who's going to clean now?"


Whoah

"That was like Magic Mountain on acid," Boogie adds. Will's thumb is broken, he figures. He's icing it. I think it was during the rope competition that he hurt it. He and Boogie then move to the bug room to discuss what's going to happen next. Boogie says that "they're into twists this year" and that they're a big flaw in the game. Whatever that's about. It's so quiet nowadays you can really hear the cameras whirring around. It's sort of like being on a spaceship, or what I like to believe a spaceship would sound like. Anyways, Erika is shaking from all that craziness. Will and Boogie join she and Janelle at the table, and Will should take an Advil, she thinks. They decide to play cards. Erika's nauseous. She's going to puke. Aside from Erika's constant moaning, no one is talking.


I'm nauseous...and have a hangnail...possibly Lyme disease...Waaaaaaah!

The sound is all echoey and it sounds like they're under water. And robots. Yes, underwater robots. Will complains about his finger some more, and says he feels worse about George leaving than Danielle. They were such bratty kids and he was the dad, cooking and cleaning. He was a terrible cook, but he meant well. "Such a sweetheart," says Will, and I think he's going to ask George to the prom. Wait! They already had that.

Creepily enough, Erika now says, "Can someone check if Janelle is actually a machine? [looks at Janelle] Let me see if you have batteries somewhere in your body right now." (Kinky!) "Why, are you scared?" asks Janelle. Erika's embarassed. Heh. "Yeah, she's a robot," Will adds quite casually. An underwater robot, I might add. Janelle's only other response is "I'm really hungry for sweets right now."

They think it must have been an awesome show. Will told Richard as much when he was getting his thumb checked out. Richard is new to me. Hmmmmmm. I'm sure he's no Cory, or even Jonah for that matter. Oh, I suppose since he was checking out Will's finger he's the doctor. Perhaps Will can charm him into "accidentally" leaving the door unlocked, allowing for his carefully planned escape. The guilt, desperation, and sense of being totally played will drive Richard to relapse and overdose on Big Brother House Clinic morphine. Waking in the hospital with the belief that all hope is lost, he'll mysteriously receive a bandana made out of a t-shirt sleeve. It bears the cryptic message "There's a plan to make all of this right ... .. .. . .. .... ... ... .. .... .... .. .. ."

Anyways, they're still trying to work out the dates. Erika just keeps repeating, "This is crazy, this is crazy, this is crazy," and it's fitting because so is she. Janelle tries to remember how the last few evictions went down last year and what the timeline was. Erika says her brother must be freaking out right now. I bet he's crazy too.


All I got for Christmas was this stupid First Aid kit

There's a lot of silence and sighing. Whirrrrr go the cameras. Oh! After some flames, we learn that Janelle got an HOH basket. I guess they're not even bothering to give her the room for one night. Oh! That's because the next HOH comp is actually tonight. Luckily she's won about 37 HOH and Vetos this year or I would say she totally got the short end of this HOH stick. "Won't be too late, cause they wanna get Julie out of here," Boogie reassures us. They also get sushi. "Spicy Tuna? I love it," Janelle confirms, if there was any doubt. Oh, I forgot to tell you that a little while ago Boogie went to pee and they totally left his mic on. He also blew his nose while he was in there.

Erika tells Will to give a toast. "I think it's pretty obvious, there's only 4 of us left in this house," he begins, "we're down to the final four guys and that is something you should be really proud of. For me, this experience has been hell on earth, horrible, and terrible, but the only reason it's been tolerable is honestly because of you three people. This is more of a hood saying, 'Don't hate the player, hate the game,' but here I hate the game and I love the players." Hmmm...I don't think that came out the way he intended. They cheers and all but I don't see it as RealPlayer's video is handily frozen. Erika goes to the diary room and as SOON as the door closes, they all spazz out about her winning the veto. Well, Janelle does and Will and Boogie play along, discuss the need to get rid of her, etc.
















Here is the church, here is the steeple....

Well, it seems now that they can't get off the topic of the season's remaining timeline. Boogie figures there won't be a show on Sunday because people are boating because it's labour day. Then the new TV season starts, then there's football, so really in the next 3 weeks there's only going to be 5 shows. He sure knows his mathemagics. Another possibility might be that the finale is on an earlier date. No...that can't be it. They discuss what the remaining few competitions might be. Erika comes back and Janelle goes to diary, and now the exact same conversation from 5 minutes ago takes place again with Erika in place of Janelle. Oh girls, you've been so showmanced. Will says he was totally James during his last DR - no sense of humour. Boogie thinks they made some ballsy production moves tonight. Kudos to them. Erika and Will share a Twix. "Do you think the internet is on right now?" Erika asks. She also wonders whether baby Jesus flips the sun on and off with a lightswitch each day.

Boogie and Will want Janelle (oh yeah, it's been a while, and Janelle is back now) to tell them more about Howie and Kaysar. I think it has to do with what they think the competition might be. Will wants to "talk it out." Howie likes football and U2, Kaysar reads a lot. Will says Howie also likes women. "So for Howie we've got U2, football, and misogyny then?" asks Boogie. Sigh. I have to give him props for that. Janelle confirms, "His favorite magazine is Playboy. Or Maxim. His first job was giving blood." "And sperm donation," adds Will. Boogie seems really nervous about this competition, whatever it may be. He'd much rather play instincts than memory skill games. He begins to list things off about various people. He figures James is a Dave Matthews and Coldplay kind of guy. Jase: Country boy, used to be a party animal, was in the air force, was in a frat, likes the Dixie Chicks. Marcellas: is almost 40. Danielle is representin' Culture Club, Wham. Janelle tells Boogie to ask Erika about Alison, Diane, Nakomis, and Marci. Alison was into pageants and was feminine and girly. Will flosses. Boogie asks if Diane is "like a Lollapalooza girl or what?" Janelle thinks she likes country.


A broken thumb won't stand in the way of dental hygiene. NEVER!

A mystery voice asks from the PA system, "Hey houseguests, how did it go?" and they all chime, "FINE" in an annoyed tone. It was awesome. But then instantly, flames. Not awesome at all. They're lasting forever, so I think the HOH comp is happening now. So, regrettably, I must sign off. Until next time, keep fit and have fun!